Single folks… you know what time of the year it is! It’s time to set new year’s dating intentions and new year’s relationship resolutions.
One resolution on your list may be to find a healthy romantic relationship. Culture and social media would have us believe that all is lost for healthy relationships; but it’s not! Dating trends tell us that more people actually want healthy relationships rather than the toxic ones portrayed on social media. So, if more people want a healthy relationship then why are so many of us single? Maybe we all just need a little bit of help to get us on the right track. In this blog, we are going to give you some tips and tools to help you finally find the one in 2023.
The pandemic allowed us to spend the last three years in self-reflection mode; which is actually a great foundation for a healthy relationship. The more self-aware you are, the better equipped you are to pick the right partner.
Dating Tip #1: Set Realistic Expectations
The first tip to add to your new year relationship resolutions is setting realistic expectations of what you are looking for in a partner. You are amazing and you deserve an equally amazing partner to share your life with. But let’s make sure unrealistic relationship goals are not the reason why you are still single — we are not being harsh, we just want you to succeed in dating (smile).
When you are self-aware, you know what you want and need in a partner and relationship. When you know who you are and your plans for the future, it is easier to know what qualities you need in a partner to compliment your future. As a result, you will also be able to quickly spot red flags for dating (i.e., anything that gets in the way of you having the future you desire).
Keep in mind that having common interests in relationships are important, but don’t be afraid to date someone you wouldn’t usually date; just make sure you can co-exist and not clash. If you are unsure of what you should be looking for in a partner, here are some examples of dating standards that will lead to a healthy relationship:
- Someone you have fun with
- Someone whose morals can co-exist with yours
- Someone who can support you in reaching your goals
- Someone with a similar lifestyle
- Someone that desires a similar future
When evaluating your standards, ask yourself if your expectations are ones you can reciprocate for a partner. Dating (and love) is a two way street, always.
We recommend checking out our Black Women Deserve series on how to date better and attract the perfect mate from me, your CarpeDM matchmaker and dating coach. I’ll teach you what questions to ask on your first date to get a real sense of who your match is, their intentions, and how to go from talking to dating.
Access the full Black Women Deserve Series by getting your CarpeDM membership today.
Dating Tip #2: Maintain Clear Boundaries
For some of you, your expectations are already realistic and you’re wondering why was dating so hard in 2022?
This takes us to our second tip; maintaining clear boundaries. For some of us, knowing what we need in a relationship isn’t the problem, it’s sticking to our list. The dating process can be daunting. Knowing your worth can be lonely. I get it. But it’s important you respect your own boundaries and not waiver on your dating standards if you are going to have a healthy relationship.
Dating Tip #3: Try Something New
We know, dating apps suck and dating for working professionals can be tough. You are too busy to go out and meet people and tired of wasting money on bad dates. You know what you want and need in a partner, and you are not going to settle — but how do you meet that partner if you’ve given up on dating apps and not making time to meet new people? Your partner is not going to break into your house and find you, you have to be intentional about meeting your potential bae. It may be time to try something new… matchmaking!
I know some of you are more traditional, and the idea of meeting someone via a matchmaker sounds outlandish (or embarrassing), but the reality is that online dating is the number one way of meeting black professionals. If you need a little more convincing, look up dating app success stories. Tons of married people share how they met on a dating app or were introduced by a matchmaker.
CarpeDM is an exclusive matchmaking service and dating app for highly educated professional singles. As a CarpeDM matchmaker and emotional intelligence coach, I’m all too familiar with our clients and black men/women and dating difficulty. That’s why CarpeDM was created. It’s also one of the best dating apps for young professionals. If you are interested in dating a professional, checkout CarpeDM. Shameless plus in 3…2…1… CarpeDM is one of the best dating apps in 2023.
What was it that Einstein said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” Well, how can you expect a different result for your dating life if you’re not willing to do things differently in 2023.
Unlike in other cultures (Indian Matchmaker) where the value of matchmaking is well known, most Black Americans do not have any experience with black dating sites for professionals. So we’re also sharing the value of having someone helping you on this journey. For us, having a personal matchmaker is similar to having a personal trainer, assistant, chef, or driver. The goal is to enhance your life by taking something important off your shoulders that the other person is better suited to do. And we’re better suited to help you find love.
As you are trying new ways of meeting people, keep an open mind and heart! It’s very tempting to feel hopeless after a bad dating experience. But that’s why we date! Dating is so that two individuals engage with each other with time and activities to evaluate romantic compatibility. We know dating works, even if not right away. People are dating and building meaningful connections, marriages, and families. Love is and will always be a part of our lives. But you’ve gotta do it right!
So, if you’re looking for love then it’s more important than ever to prioritize your standards, keep your boundaries, and move on when a relationship is not what you’re looking for. But whatever you do, DON’T GIVE UP. Keep your mind and heart open to receiving and giving love.
New year, new relationship! Love is always possible but it’s going to require you to first, set realistic expectations based on the future you are working towards; and second, maintain your boundaries. If you are going to have a healthy relationship in the new year, it might be time to try something new to meet people. Even if you are not quite open to dating apps, at least go outside. And last but not least, don’t give up!
About the author: Erin F. Darden is a CarpeDM matchmaker, emotional intelligence coach, and relationships expert. She started her coaching business based on the lessons, skills, behaviors, and tools she acquired while creating a life that she loves. Book a free matchmaker consultation with Erin today!
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For too long, Black men and women have faced color discrimination both inside and outside of the dating world. The arrival of dating apps presented a new blueprint for how to meet singles but carried the same trends of gender and race discrimination and inexplicably, Black women have ended up at the bottom of the dating totem pole. These modern dating trends have also proved to be frustrating for Black men dating. Even the top dating sites for Black professionals weren’t quite hitting the mark.
If you are a Black woman professional, or someone looking to meet professional black singles at the hottest date spots in the DMV, we’ve got your back. CarpeDM is the best dating app for Black women and people like you who are seeking to date them. Our mission is to provide a real Black love app experience that fosters genuine connections.
Dating as a Black woman, we know you’ve asked yourself or a love interest, “would you date a Black girl?” at least once. We’ve been spoon-fed the idea that no one wants to date a Black woman. Well, that’s just untrue! Every suitor in the CarpeDM community is eager to black professionals dating like you!
We are set to be positioned as the best suitor dating app for those seeking to date Black women because we aren’t trying to help everyone find love, we’re focusing on you! Our love experts carefully vet every single profile and curate matches based on compatibility. Consider CarpeDM the personal matchmaker for Black professionals.
So, how does matchmaking work? Create your CarpeDM profile and once your application is approved, you will meet with a personal matchmaker who will learn about you and your dating needs and curate matches for you. Our community includes the most eligible singles in some of the best dating cities in the US. If you’ve been searching for matchmaking in Washington DC, or Black matchmaking services in the DMV, look no further!
Don’t be shy, apply today to meet someone amazing!
